Ok, my s.o. boyfriend and I have been together for a year or so. He’s not dense. Actually he’s especially observant and better than I am alot of the time. For instance if we notice a fashion faux pas (you know, the too tight garment resulting in the overhang of doughy flesh or the just not right shoes with certain clothes combination). He has the immediate ability of what the best correct look is, whereas I often have to ponder it a second or two.
So what is up with this.
This morning I gave myself a pedicure and manicure (with a nail polish color that HE chose). It’s a Sunday morning, not an especially significant day, but I am feeling pretty, so I primped, which I do, from time to time.
He blurts: “Oh, you painted your nails! It looks so nice. You’ve never put nail polish on, not since I’ve known you.”
HUH? I honestly wanted to hit him. If I’d had a shoe in my hand, I would have thrown in at his head. Twang! Bam!
He honestly and actually does not remember. That bit of information is missing this Sunday morning.
What is that? What is this? What does it mean? If he can’t remember that I paint my nails red with a polish that he selected and has seen many times, what hope is there to have ANY kind of intelligent conversation or even relationship with him?
Is this a form of man amnesia?
How can I ever have a side of an argument? I don’t get it and I don’t like it. If he doesn’t remember me 'prettying up,' am I a skank? Ack! Gerk.
Ok, John Gray, the guy from the "Mars/Venus Book" says,
So what is up with this.
This morning I gave myself a pedicure and manicure (with a nail polish color that HE chose). It’s a Sunday morning, not an especially significant day, but I am feeling pretty, so I primped, which I do, from time to time.
He blurts: “Oh, you painted your nails! It looks so nice. You’ve never put nail polish on, not since I’ve known you.”
HUH? I honestly wanted to hit him. If I’d had a shoe in my hand, I would have thrown in at his head. Twang! Bam!
He honestly and actually does not remember. That bit of information is missing this Sunday morning.
What is that? What is this? What does it mean? If he can’t remember that I paint my nails red with a polish that he selected and has seen many times, what hope is there to have ANY kind of intelligent conversation or even relationship with him?
Is this a form of man amnesia?
How can I ever have a side of an argument? I don’t get it and I don’t like it. If he doesn’t remember me 'prettying up,' am I a skank? Ack! Gerk.
Ok, John Gray, the guy from the "Mars/Venus Book" says,
"When misunderstandings arise, remember
that we speak different languages; take
the time necessary to translate what your partner
really means or wants to say. This definitely takes
practice, but it is well worth it."
Fine. FINE! But answer me this. If this particular man may or may not honestly remember real stuff that happened, I am to translate that for him by serving as his adjunct memory? Further, tell me for whom is it well worth it? Hummmmm.....
Patricia
Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex
Patricia
Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus: The Classic Guide to Understanding the Opposite Sex
unremembering: (synonyms) absent-mindedness, abstraction, amnesia, blackout, blank, block out, blow, brain fade, carelessness, dreaminess, fugue, heedlessness, hypomnesia, inattention, laxness, lethe, limbo, negligence, nirvana, oblivion, obliviousness, paramnesia, repression, short memory, suppression, woolgathering
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